A new year means a new start

In a few short hours it is going to be 2013.  To some, it's no big deal, just another year.  To others, including yours truly, when the clock strikes midnight it will mean that not only is it a new year but also the dawning of a new era.  A year in which there will be many changes, hopefully for the good.  This is my year for true Mommy Misadventures!

In 2013, I am going waaaay outside my comfort zone (along with going outside my timezone).  The girl who hates change will be making one of the biggest changes of her life.  To say I wasn't apprehensive would be a lie...I'm pretty scared.  Last New Year's Eve, I was full of plans for 2012, most of which ended up getting derailed because I have no grace.  I missed races, was (and still am) unable to run, and gained weight back that I thought was lost forever.  Most of the summer was spent injured and taking care of a husband who battled numerous kidney stones.  And the best part of the year was entering that new and wonderful phase of life called peri-menopause (can you feel the sarcasm dripping off the page??).

This coming year is going to be different.

I can see you all (all meaning my 1 follower... hi Katie!!) shaking your heads and smirking.  I have found that God tends to have a sense of humor and answers my prayers and plans with His idea of how it should be.  So, how will this year be different?

I'll tell you how.  I will be different.  It's only taken me 47 years to figure out that the only thing I can change is me... and how I react to the situations (and people) in my life.  Instead of reacting, I plan to act.  I may not be able to control anything else around me but I can certainly control my own emotions and attitudes.

Tomorrow I plan on setting some specific goals for myself.  As of right now I just know in my heart that I want to be a better person.  I know I can get there.

For now, I hope everyone has a safe and happy New Year.  Hug someone special.  Smile at a stranger.

Peace

Life Goes On

I love Christmas, I really do.  It seems like a magical time of year to me.  People seem kinder, they smile more, hold doors open, say "excuse me".  Yes, I know there are those who are scroogie (yes, it's a word if I say it's a word) but I think you'll agree that for the most part people are generally moved by the Christmas spirit this time of year.

This Christmas has seemed especially hard for a lot of people.  There have been a lot of deaths, from the 27 victims in CT to the 2 firefighters in NY.  On Christmas day, I started my day responding to a full arrest of a 7 day old baby boy.  As I held 2 of his 4 siblings in my arms and listened to them sob and ask "why?" while their parents cried uncontrollably I knew that Christmas would never be magical to them again.  Instead it would be a time of loss and hurt.

I went home last night and held Princess B for a long time.  She seemed to sense that I needed this and snuggled up close and let me hold her instead of wiggling away to the next activity.  After a few minutes she looked up at me, put her hands on my cheeks and said "I love you Mommy". 

As I said, I love Christmas.  I am, however, really glad it's over now.  I'm excited about getting my house back and moving on with our plans and now that Christmas is over...let the packing begin!

We are now in the sorting phase.  What to keep, what to store, and what to give up.  It doesn't seem like it would be that hard, does it?  Well, let me tell you, it is.  I know the rule is supposed to be if you haven't used it in a year get rid of it, right?  It is just not that cut and dried.  To me, my stuff is a tangible part of my memories.  I think that as a result of not feeling loved for a lot of my growing up years I have instead attached meaning to stuff.  A lot of stuff, unfortunately.  I'm like a baby hoarder who could grow up to be a full-fledged hoarder if I am not careful.  I just don't know how to throw away my dead son's clothes or all my children's baby blankets...the blankets I wrapped them in when they got up to eat in the middle of the night.  Or the artwork they made at school.  I'm just as bad with stuff that chronicles my relationship with my husband.  Ticket stubs, dried flowers, t-shirts, stuffed animals...you get the idea.  It's not like I don't have a daily reminder of how awesome he is but I still can't seem to let go.

I'm working very hard to overcome this issue.  I don't want to start our new chapter in life feeling cluttered or messy.  Down-sizing is the word of the day.

I'm not sure where I wanted to go with this.  I have a lot of words that I haven't had time to get out lately.  Now that we are moving forward, I'm hoping that I will be able to be more consistent here.

The plan for today:  Take down the tree, get out to the gym, play with my kid. 

Go hug someone.  Peace!

An Update to My Silence

I've been pretty quiet since my surgery for a number of reasons.  A lot has been going on in my life besides surgery recovery and I a) didn't know where to start and b) I don't want to seem like a Debbie Downer.  I sometimes feel like all I do is complain and that really isn't who I am.  I'm generally an upbeat kind of girl, so much so that I'm sure I annoy my friends and children with my "glass is half full" attitude.  The fact that I've been so down lately is a testament to the continuous stress I've been under.

So let's talk about stress.  My stress is no different from anyone else's, really.  Maybe the particulars are but we are all under some sort of stress.  I work a high stress job and have for a very long time so I've generally been able to deal with it pretty well (without any chemicals, I might add!).  How, you ask?  My main stress reliever for the last 2 years or so is... running.

(I literally just saw a light bulb go on over your collective heads)

So, since June 1st I have been unable to utilize my biggest stress reliever.  Since that time there has been major work stress, kid drama, health issues, and school pressures and I have not found a new way in which to deal with any of it.  The result is not pretty, let me tell you.  I cry...a lot.  For no reason.  My old insecurities rear their ugly heads and I give in to them which causes more tears, more heart ache, more stress.  With more stress comes more tears and more insecurities...

You get the idea.

Don't get me wrong... not all of my emotional outbursts and feelings of gloom and doom are unwarranted.  I have some honest to goodness stuff going on.  I'm just not dealing with it very well right now.

Let's take a look at the particulars:

1. Surgery:  my toe is not cooperating.  The first day after the dressing came off (10 days post-op), the incision came open.  2 weeks post-op I returned to work.  When I got home (in a lot of pain), the incision not only was open, but bleeding.  Off work another week.
2. TMI (in case I have any male readers) My version of PMS (peri-menopause shit).  Still no period but no other symptoms so I worry that maybe it's something more.
3. My son:  #1 son strikes again.  This time he's not just being insensitive but is in real trouble.  Even if I wanted to help him, there is no way I can.  I am ashamed of his behavior and this shame brings me guilt.  Lots of guilt.  Is it something I did or didn't do that makes him do these things?  I doubt myself as a mother and I hurt for him and my grandson.
4. Work (or lack thereof):  No work = no paycheck.  Merry Christmas.
5. School:  I feel like I am constantly behind.  Our research project is at a standstill, waiting for approvals to continue.  I just want it to be over.
6. My house:  it's a mess.  I haven't been able to take care of it since my surgery and if I don't do it then it pretty much doesn't get done.  I don't like asking my already overworked husband to do more than he already is and I am not very good at asking for help.
7. And, finally, my marriage.  How much of the neglect I feel is real and how much is a result of my magnified emotions?  I don't know.  All I know is a lot of the time I feel invisible, unloved, and alone.

Here's the million dollar question:  What exactly can I do about all of this?  When I list it out like that and really take a good look...well, nothing really.  Things are what they are and either I deal with it and accept it and have some peace or I don't and I continue feeling miserable.  It's simple really.  Simple but not easy.

While I ponder that I will leave you with this graphic that I am borrowing from Single Dad Laughing (an excellent blog, BTW).

Simple, right?

Take time today to really look around and be grateful.  That's what my plan for the day is!

Peace!

Election Day

All I have to say today is GET OUT THERE AND VOTE!

Peace

Post Op day 1

Well, I survived.  Yesterday, I was feeling ok, I had an anesthetic block on my foot so it was only a little sore.  This morning, however, was a different story entirely.

The block had worn off by the time I got up and I must have stepped wrong because I had such bad pain that I literally burst into tears.  That is just not me.  I scared Princess B and ever since she's been telling me "it'll be ok mommy!".  I don't think she is actually telling me, though, I think she is telling herself.

The doc has since upped my pain meds and that seems to be working so far.  I'm not getting much homework done but I sure did get a lot pinned on Pinterest!

A more thoughtful post will be forthcoming when I am better able to be coherent.  Until then, I will watch ND football and snack on game food that my step-mom was kind enough to cook for us.

Peace!

Thoughtful today

It's amazing how many thoughts can run through one's head on the day of surgery.   Yes, today is the day and, quite frankly, I am scared.  I can tell myself all day that it's a simple surgery and that I have a good doctor but that doesn't seem to make me feel any better.  

The problem with being a nurse is that you know too much.  You know what can go wrong, even under the best of circumstances.  My mind keeps circling around the fact that I'm not just scared, I am terrified.  I have so much still left to be done and I am scared that I will lose that today.

I will admit, I am anxious in even the best of times, worried when things are going well that somehow I will jinx it and it will all go to Hell in a hand basket (sidenote:  what the heck does that even mean?!  I must google it!).  I spend so much time worrying that I am not able to enjoy and be happy a lot of the time.  I'm working on that but it's so so hard to live in the moment and not worry about the what ifs when some of those what ifs have already happened in life.

Anyway, here is the message I would like to convey today:  Don't let your lives be ruled by the what ifs.  It is exhausting, to say the least.  Plan for the future, but enjoy the moment.  Let the people you love know it!  Be kinder, gentler, and more forgiving.  Let go of the things that hurt or anger you.  In the end, you won't regret doing any of those things but you may regret it if you don't do them.

p.s.  Going to Hell in a handbasket:  to be rapidly deteriorating - on course for disaster.

full story here:  Going to Hell in a handbasket

Is it ever possible?

Is it ever possible to find a place in this world where one can be one's self?  I have been finding lately that it is much easier for me to be silent than to be myself, make jokes, be angry or hurt... or whatever I'm feeling...than it is to share with people.  I offend when I don't mean to or become the bad guy when I try to help.  Even with my family and friends, the people I'm supposed to be able to be open with.  In the end, I end up feeling rotten and alone.

Case in point.  A nurse at work made a mistake.  Not a big mistake but something that needed to be corrected.  I took her aside to tell her the right way to do it and she cried.  I made her cry.  I didn't mean to and I thought I was being nice.  I went home feeling like the meanest person in the world.

I can't tell my grown kids when they hurt me without being the bad guy.  I can't talk to my husband about things that are bothering me because he doesn't see it as I do.  I can't joke with my friends to blow off steam because then I am insensitive.

So I will sit quietly.  Keep what I think and feel to myself.  Eventually, it won't matter anymore.

A reminder of myself

A friend of mine reminded me tonight who I really am and what I can do when I put my mind to it.  I've been so overwhelmed with stuff happening "to" me that I'd forgotten that I really do have control... over how I react to the world and the stuff that sometimes just seems to bury me.  Sometimes someone will say something at just the right time and a light bulb will go on.

See these medals?

I earned those.  With a lot of blood, sweat, and tears.  Literally.  It seems like a lifetime ago but it was really over the last 2 years, the last one being in May.  I may be sidelined now with my injury but I WILL get back to my old self again.

See the sign on the shelf?  My daughter was just under 2 when my husband made that sign to cheer me on at the Disneyland Half Marathon last year.  Now, when I run on my Dreadmill she stands next to me shouting "go mommy, go mommy!".  My Princess B believes in me and who am I to let her down?

So, thank you Dawn, for reminding me of what I have inside of me.  I know you didn't intend that with your simple questions but that's what you accomplished.  Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. <3

Peace.

Transitions

Until recently, I'd never really thought of all the transitions that we, as people, go through during our lifetime.  Sometimes we call them milestones, turning points, or achievements but it pretty much means the same thing: change.

I've never been a big fan of change, of any kind.  I tend to mourn the passing of time for the same reason a toddler doesn't want to nap... I'm afraid I'm missing something.  Instead of looking for the beauty and adventure in the newest phase of my life, I become incredibly sad about leaving behind the current phase.

I've been thinking a lot about life lately, reflecting on the things I did or didn't do...and how many times my life has changed dramatically.  From birth, we grow and change, at first on a daily basis.  As we get past the infant, toddler, and preschool phases that growth slows down.  I'd always thought of those phases as being the most dramatic changes but as I've gotten older, I've changed my mind.

As an adult, I've experienced major changes many times.  I married, had kids, moved across country twice, had my heart broken when I lost my boys, divorced, started a career, went back to school as an "older" adult, remarried, started a second career, and had another child at an "advanced" age.  Now I find that I am again transitioning into a new time of my life while continuing to remain in the old one.  It is quite unsettling and isolating.

I feel like no one really understands why I feel the way I do.  I also don't want to hurt anyone's feelings because of the reasons I am sad.  By that I mean why I feel isolated and not a part of any group or able to really open up and lean on the people I call my friends.

See, I belong to a unique (and dare I say, elite?) group of older moms of toddlers.  By older I don't mean in my 30's.  Heck no, they are mere amateurs!  I had Princess B when I was 44...6 weeks after my first grandson was born.  So if you do the math (and I know you were...), I am 47 years old.  I am approaching menopause and I am pretty sure my child bearing days are over.  Now, my friends who are my age are puzzled by my feelings of loss and tell me on a daily basis that they don't have any idea how I could possibly keep up with a 3 year old.  I get a lot of "better you than me!" comments...which, if you think about it, is kind of rude.

On the flip side, the moms I know who have kids Princess B's age are significantly younger and are still expanding their families.  While I am extremely happy for them, it is also extremely difficult for me to hear about getting pregnant.  It hurts, sometimes like a kick in the gut, to know that I am done.  It is not their fault that they are younger and still in that stage of life.  It's not their fault that I am past that now and am having trouble adjusting to it.  And because it is not their fault, I don't want to share with them how I feel, even though they are some of my closest friends.  Or maybe it's because they are some of my closest friends.  I don't want to make them feel badly or like they can't talk about it.

I know that I am extremely blessed.  I have 5 beautiful children.  I'm (mostly) healthy.  I'm married to a good man.  I have a job I love.  I'm getting ready to embark on a huge adventure.  I have a lot to be grateful for.

I will get past this.  I will eventually embrace this new time in my life and get back to enjoying the simple act of living in the moment.  Longing for the past is as bad as wishing time away...it takes us away from all that is beautiful in the present.

Peace!

Not a post for everyone

This isn't a weight loss blog but since it's a blog about me and my life it will definitely include some weight stuff.  Fair warning for this post...if you don't want to hear about weight or fitness, this is a post to skip.

I had a rude awakening yesterday when I casually hopped on the scale.  I hadn't really been paying attention to anything weight related for awhile...not since I broke my toe in June, actually.  I still went to the gym to work with the trainer but I couldn't run and I ate pretty much whatever I wanted.  This wouldn't have been an issue 10 years ago but at 47 years old things have sure changed.  In 4 months I've packed on 20+ pounds.  I'm uncomfortable, nothing fits right, my endurance is shot, and I just feel yucky.  I hate looking at myself in the mirror.  When I saw that number on the scale yesterday (my heaviest weight EVER) I just wanted to curl in a ball and cry.  I didn't even weigh this much when I was full term pregnant!

I allowed myself to feel sorry for myself for about 5 minutes and then I went into action.  I joined Weight Watchers Online with the idea that paying for it would make me actually use it.  Today I saw my trainer and worked the hardest I've worked since my injury, including running a mile at race pace (sort of).  I huffed and puffed and poured sweat but I didn't complain once and I did what was asked of me.  Tomorrow I may not be able to lift my arms but moving is just over-rated right?

I tracked all my food today and went out and bought fruits and veggies for the next 2 days.  More than that and it will go bad so I'll just have to deal with shopping every couple days.

I've had so much water today that I slosh when I walk and have spent way too much time in the bathroom.

The thing is, I could continue to feel sorry for myself for this physical mess I am in, beating myself up and giving up saying I can't do it...but I can't do that.  It's not in me and now I feel challenged.  I WILL get to where I want to be.  I will be healthy and strong and beautiful.  I will make my family proud and I will be around when my youngest grows up.  I've faced many things in my life and I will not let extra weight be the death of me, literally or figuratively.

Oh, and for those who are wondering, I have 59 pounds to lose.  It is not a Biggest Loser amount but it seems like a lot to me when I am staring at the starting line.

I won't bore you in every post about this side of my journey...I know it can probably get old to people who don't understand how important this can be.  I've decided that since Mondays are my weigh in day, I'll save all my weight related updates for that day and have my regular post content the rest of the time (whatever the heck that is!).

Now go drink some water!

Peace

A time of reflection

Yep... that says "Jemmy" and is kind of an indication of how my actual birthday went.  I had to work and it was a long, complicated day.  The upside is that I had 2 cakes and 2 dozen cupcakes and my grandson and his mom sent me flowers:

Anyway, my birthday isn't what I wanted to talk about today...at least not directly.  Generally, every year around this time I go into a pretty big funk.  I don't know if it's because my birthday reminds me of the passing of time and I usually don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything or what exactly it is but it happens every year.  Except this year.  This year feels different.

I've had a rough summer.  Physically, emotionally, personally, and professionally it's just been a challenge.  Now, I find myself coming out on the other side feeling hopeful for the future...at least 85% of the time.  I'm in the home stretch with school, things are better at home, I'm feeling pretty confident at work, and we have a lot of big plans for the near future.  It's liberating to feel positive about life.  I never really realized how much energy it takes to be sad.

So here's to the next year that is sure to be full of change and excitement!

Peace!

A post about nothing

In the 11 days since my last post I have been busy, emotional, lazy, overwhelmed, uninspired, and just plain tired...not necessarily in that order.  As a result, this post will be as aimless as I've felt lately.

With the above disclaimer, I present my week and a half in pictures...

Princess B got her first big girl bed...

...and a black eye when she fell out of bed the first night in it =(

I got flowers, just because I'd had a hard weekend.

We did some artwork (that handsome guy is my grandson, L)

I did A LOT of homework (blech!)

 Colored my hair (it looks better now than it did at first)...

 Bought myself a Starbuck's gift card for my birthday...

Did a mountain of laundry (that I plan to fold tonight...I promise)...

In that 11 days I had:
1 garage sale
1 bottle of wine
1 transport to E. Chicago
2 patients in 5 work days
60+ hours of work
7 loads of laundry
14 cups of coffee
3 trips to the gym
3 miles of running (pathetic =( )
ENTIRELY TOO MUCH STRESS!

I will now take this moment to breathe and think of this:

oh yeah... I also talked to a couple of recruiters today and am feeling a lot more secure in my decision to move...so I guess things aren't all THAT bad...

My new mantra:  "just a few more months"

No Puppies and Rainbows Today

I have hesitated in writing a new post lately.  In my line of work, one has to take the sad days with the good days and lately there have been a lot of sad days in the PICU.  Some days it just seems so difficult to do my job.  People come into my life at the worst time in their lives and it's my job to be not only their child's nurse but their source of hope, comfort, and strength.  And when there is no hope of giving a parent the answer they want to hear, it hurts to be the one who has to continue to repeat the same answers over and over again.  Then there are the times when even though a patient will eventually be ok, the family won't.  Multiple traumas, fires, car accidents...how do you explain to a parent why one child was taken and another wasn't?

I often share my losses with my patient's parents if I think it will give them some insight on what they are going through.  While I know every situation is different, there is a common bond between parents who have lost children.  It is the club no one wants to join but it often gives one strength to know that someone else has gone through it and survived.  My emotional investment in my patients and their families can take a big toll on me, though.

Today as I get ready to leave for work, I mentally put on my armor and pray for the right words to say to parents who have lost children, parents who stand by and watch their child hurt while powerless to do anything for them, and parents who may or may not have their hopes dashed.  I pray for the strength to hold these parents up when they are unable to hold themselves up.

Peace.

Finally a relevant update

Relevant, yes... positive, no.

I finally got a call from HR in Hawaii.  I got the stock answer "we decided to go with an internal candidate".  Funny since I was told initially there was more than one position.

Needless to say, I am discouraged.  Here's to hoping that finding a traveling position in June is easier or I may end up living on the beach.

So....Why?

I've had a lot of people ask me why we want to move to Hawaii.  Aside from the obvious (it's paradise...HELLO!), what started it was my husband's ambitions.

My husband is the smartest person I know.  He may work as a paramedic but his true love was always research.  Specifically marine biology and coral genetic research.  His dream was to go somewhere where he could do research for a living.  For that kind of research, we had 3 choices:  Australia, Florida, and Hawaii.  In the first 2, he'd have to actually go away for months at a time to live on an island and do his research.  While he may at times prefer this, I would not.  That left Hawaii and the University of Hawaii.

As I began researching the university and the hospitals there I began to get on the bandwagon.  U of H has a pediatric nurse practitioner program and the children's hospital services the entire South Pacific with fixed wing transport.

It still took me a few years before I was really comfortable planning such a big move.  I didn't want to leave my older kids and, frankly, I was scared to fail.  As the kids got older and moved farther and farther away with their own lives I decided it was time to live my own, scared or not.

I've run into a lot of people who have tried to talk me out of it.  "It's too expensive"  "It's too far away"  "What will you do with no family?"  I don't know if people think this is spur of the moment and that I've done no research on it at all, or what.  Yes, I know things cost more but I'll also be making more.  Yes, it's far away but there are planes.  Yes, some family will be far away but some of the most important people in my life are coming with me so I think we'll be ok.

No other news on the ER job yet.  I'm continuing with my planning as if it doesn't exist.  I have a lot to do in a short 9 months!

Take care of yourselves.  Smile as if you are up to something.  And hug someone for no reason.

Peace.

I don't know why I was worried

I was so worried that I'd run out of things to write about in between big updates on our move.  Silly me.  When one has kids, it's almost guaranteed that when it seems as if things are going smoothly the chit will eventually hit the fan.  This happened over the holiday weekend in my little world.

I have a lot of kids.  I've always said that they have meetings to decide who is going to be the troublemaker of the week (or day... sometimes of the hour).  With four of them grown and out of the house, I figure I'm on easy street with just the 3 year old to deal with.  My mistake was letting down my guard.

Today, we're going to talk about my oldest son.  R and I have always had our issues; he's a high maintenance kid but while he lacks in common sense I don't think he's a bad kid.  He can be loving and kind as well as selfish and irresponsible.  Lately, I thought things were going so well with him.  He'd come out of a long string of bad decisions and was finally taking care of his responsibilities and acting (for the most part) like a grown up.

Back story:  he got his high school girlfriend pregnant senior year and I have a beautiful grandson who just turned 3 (6 weeks older than Princess B).  Up until the last 6 months, he hadn't been taking responsibility and had not been able to keep a job longer than a few weeks.  He burned all his bridges with family and friends.  Then, after ending up in a homeless shelter 6 hours from home, he joined the Army.  It was a struggle but he overcame everything that came his way and graduated boot camp and AIT.  He paid his back child support.  I thought things were on the upswing for him

Then he came home this weekend for his son's birthday.  He brought his girlfriend (I'd met her once).  In the midst of party preparation he dropped the news completely out of the blue that they had gotten married.  That's right.  I said married.  And he can't understand why I am upset that I found out after the fact.

I hope that one day he can understand the why.  I really don't know how to explain it to him so that he'll understand.  I hope that his understanding isn't brought about by the actions of his own children.

I don't know right now when or if I'll get over this.  Even if I don't, I really hope this works out for him simply because I don't want him hurt.  He may have hurt me but he is my son and I would protect him from pain in any way I could.

Thank you, God

Tonight will be a short post...today was an even longer day than yesterday if that's possible!  Darn full moon strikes again.

I want to give a shout out to Kate, my one and only follower...thanks to her, I had 44 page views yesterday!  I guess I better start writing interesting stuff, huh?

No news on the Hawaii front today.  Not surprising since it's a holiday weekend.  For these few days I'm concentrating on work, homework, and my grandson's birthday party on Monday.  My plan is to call them on Tuesday.

For those of you who are walking into this in the middle (which is similar to turning on the tv in the middle of a show), the cliff notes version is while we are definately planning to move in June, my dream job popped up on my search engine last month so it was decided that I'd apply for it.  The job is a residency program for seasoned critical care nurses to cross train to ER.  Anyway, I've passed a pharmacology test and had a phone interview with the educator and now I'm waiting on a video interview to be set up.  Waiting a long time and getting frustrated.  I just keep telling myself that what happens is what is supposed to happen and even if I don't get this job, we are definately going to Hawaii in June.  Did I accidently pray for patience?!

I did learn one thing today.  I went to work today with the mindset that I may as well have a positive attitude because positive or negative I was going to have to be there anyway.  What I learned was that when I have thoughts like that, God likes to have a little giggle at my expense.  All in good fun, right?  Everytime I turned around, something new was thrown at me making it very hard to keep that smile glued in place.  Gotta love Him, right?  The smile is still there, albeit a little crooked, and I have only one more day to work before my days off.

Take time to laugh today.  Tell someone you appreciate them.  And in the words of my grandma (as said to me everytime I complained about something):  "Have you thanked God for that?"

Peace.

A long day

Some days I just don't know why I keep doing what I'm doing.  I feel like I should get a job at WalMart (not Target though I'd like the discount but one of my best friends is mad at them and I have some loyalty).  What gets me through the 12+ hours is knowing what I'm coming home to:

I'm so grateful for these 2 people and they bring me more joy that I could possibly describe in a blog post.

In other news, I promised background on my next big adventure.  If you know my husband and me, you know that we've longed to blow this popstand and head off to paradise...i.e. Hawaii.  Everytime it seemed as if it may become a possibility, something would happen and we'd put it off (one of those "somethings" was the birth of my Princess B).

Well, folks, the time is now.  The bigger kids are grown and Princess B isn't in school yet.  A month or so ago we sat down and decided it was now or never and started planning a move in June, after I graduate.

Since I am extremely tired I think I will call it a night.  Next up?  The why's of it :)

Peace people.  Go hug someone you love.

A New Direction

So, I decided the other day that it would be great to start really keep track of all the craziness going on right now during this time of change in our lives.  I thought to myself, "Jenny, why don't you start a blog about planning a huge move halfway around the world and all the ups and downs it involves."  Low and behold, when I logged onto blogspot I already had a dusty old blog with all of 2 posts in it from almost a year ago!

And, here we are.  I suppose you will want to know some of the particulars like where we are going.  And when.  And maybe why.  I'll get to all that.  I promise =)

For right now, I will leave you with this:  I promise to not leave you hanging.  I want you all to come along on my newest Mommy Misadventure!